Sunday, October 17, 2010

Pot-Luck-Humor - Ladies Candy

 





 

How Vibrators Are Better Than Men!

It's happy to keep going until we're satisfied.

Vibrators don't prematurely ejaculate

A vibrator doesn't have an orgasm first and then just stop "vibrating."

They don't get tired after the first time

You never have to lie to a vibrator by saying it was good or ... that you had an orgasm.

Vibrators are never too busy watching the game on TV ... or Fishin'!

Vibrators  never go limp and rubbery, you simply replace the batteries when it tires.

Batteries are cheaper than pick up trucks!!

You can throw them in a drawer and only take them out when you want to!

Vibrators don't hog the remote ... Nor the computer!!

We can get a bigger one or one that has better options whenever we want without being called a slut.

Position is your choice, not his.

You don't have to suck it.

It works "while" the sports games are on.

It always is hard.

It doesn't leave a mess behind.

You don't have to wear an ill fitting teddy to excite it.

It doesn't care that you gained 10 lbs.

It doesn't fall asleep and snore in your ear afterwards.

You don't have to clean up the apartment before bringing it home.

You don't have to cook it breakfast and pretend to be interested in it the next morning.

They never poke you in the back in the morning to see if you are in the mood.

They never drink too much and embarrass you.

You don't have to tell the vibrator he's the best you ever had!

Safe sex without a rubber

Vibrators don't ask who your Daddy is

Vibrators do what you want them to do at ALL times!

Vibrators are portable so you can do it anytime anywhere you want!!

They never ask how they were.

They don't burp, fart, belch or fall asleep on you.

You don't have to stroke its ego.

They never wake up at 4 a.m. asking for another get-go.

It doesn't leave a wet spot.

You can carry it with you at all times, and not feel obligated to feed it.

It doesn't require "a little lip action" to get hard

It has no problem finding the "g spot."

You know exactly where its been.

Vibrators don't care if you get crumbs in the bed.

 




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