MisfitsCafe.com - Engineering Vocabulary

 

Engineering Vocabulary  1. "It Is In Process" - So wrapped up in red tape that the situation is hopeless.  2. "We'll look into it" - By the time the wheel makes a full turn,  We assume that you'll have forgotten about it too.  3. "A Program" - Any assignment that can't be completed with one phone call.  4. "Expedite" - To confound confusion with commotion.  5. "Channels" - The trail left by inter-office memos.  6. "Co-ordinator" - The guy who has a desk between two expediters.  7. "Consultant" - Any ordinary guy with a briefcase 50 miles from home.  8. "To activate" - To make copies and add more names to the memo.  9. "To implement a program" - Hire more people and expand the office. 10. "Under Consideration" - Never heard of it. 11. "Under active consideration" - We're looking for the file. 12. "A meeting" - A mulling by master-minds. 13. "A Conference" - A place where conversation is substituted for the dreariness of labour and the loneliness of thought. 14. "To negotiate" - To seek a meeting of the minds without the knocking of heads together. 15. "Re-Orientation" - Getting used to working again. 16. "Reliable source" - The guy you just met. 17. "Informed source" - The guy who told the guy you just met. 18. "Unimpeachable source" - The guy who started the rumour. 19. "A Clarification" - To fill in the background with so many details that the foreground goes underground. 20. "We are making a survey" - We need more time to think of an answer. 21. "Note and Initial" - Let's spread the responsibility for this. 22. "Let's get together on this" - I'm assuming you're as confused as I am. 23. "See me about it" - Come down to the office, I'm lonely. 24. "Give us the benefit of your present thinking" - We'll listen to what you have to say as long as it doesn't interfere with what      We have already decided to do. 25. "We will advise you in due course" - When we figure it out we'll let you know. 26. "To give someone the Picture" - A long confused and inaccurate statement to a newcomer. 27. "Forwarded for your consideration" - You hold the bag for awhile. 28. "Approved, subject to comment" - Redo the damn thing while you're waiting.

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