MisfitsCafe.com - THIS is TRUE:!

 

THIS is TRUE:!   TRIPLE THREAT: John D. Gilliand of Aluchua County, Fla., feels "threatened" by former Florida Gators quarterback Tim Tebow, President Barack Obama, and Jesus Christ, and petitioned in court for a restraining order against each. "I was trespassed from the Kangaroo Gas Station for saying T-Bo sucks," he explained. Gilliand's court filing notes he believes all three defendants are in gangs, or are flashing some kind of gang symbol at him. Not surprisingly, all three petitions were immediately denied. But Gilliand filed supplemental affidavits against Tebow and Obama to get the court to reconsider. (JW/Orlando Sentinel) ... So, Jesus is forgiven?   BEWARE THE CUMULO-GRANITE: Vladimir Frolov, 50, came to southern California from Russia to skydive in Perris, a popular jumping spot. He jumped, and was not seen again. Search and rescue teams looked for two days without finding any sign of him. Two months later, a farmer called police to report finding a body in a field. The man he found was wearing two un deployed parachutes. "We haven't positively identified the remains," a Riverside County sheriff's investigator said, but on the other hand, "we're only missing one skydiver." (RC/Los Angeles Times) ... That they know of.    THE PEN IS MIGHTIER THAN THE SWORD: A teacher at an elementary school in North Brookfield, Mass., jumped to the logical conclusion of zero tolerance and notified students and their parents in writing that pens and pencils were now banned. They were not to carry writing implements on their person or backpacks. When needed, pencils would be issued -- but must be turned in at the end of the day. Sixth-grade teacher Wendy Scott said any student caught with a pen or pencil would be assumed to have stolen it from the school "to build weapons". Principal Deborah Peterson countermanded the directive "as soon as I became aware of it," she said. (RC/Worcester Telegram) ... Ms. Scott notified parents in writing -- and then immediately suspended herself.   SHE MADE A GOOD DECISION: Francisco Hernandez, 22, stopped by a burger restaurant in Pico Rivera, Calif., to ask his girlfriend The Question.  "Stacy Will You Marry Me?" was written on the back window of his car, but "she said no," said Lt. Andrew Berg of the Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department. "He was a little unhappy with that." Hernandez allegedly went back to his car and drove it onto the sidewalk and tried to run the woman down, but missed her. He escaped, driving away with two flat tires. As deputies headed to his house to talk with him, "our helicopter guys spotted him walking down the street carrying a bouquet of flowers," Berg said. Hernandez was arrested and charged with assault with a deadly weapon. (RC/Los Angeles Times) ... Apparently he was on his way to his second choice's place.

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