| A Few Sunday Laffs! A couple bought themselves a squirrel pet. One night they went out for dinner and locked the squirrel in the closet. Later that night, a thief broke into their house. The thief was in the process of stealing the couple's valuables when he heard the couple's car arriving home. The thief then immediately hid in the closet. The owners came into the house, and went straight to bed. But in the middle of the night they were awoken by a scream. The husband opened the closet to see the thief squirming on the floor. The husband immediately bound the thief tightly with some rope and asked what made him yell so loud. The thief replied in pain, "When your damn squirrel mistook my ass for a hollow in a tree -- I held out; then it mistook my balls for nuts, I gritted my teeth; but when it decided to carry the nuts into the hollow I screamed."
I asked my missus if we could try the Chilean Miner position the other night. She asked if that was the one where she goes deep down my shaft and stays there until she needs to come up for air? I told her no, it's the one where she fucks off and I don't see her for 4 months.
Little Johnny had a first date lined up with a woman he had been after for quite a while. When she finally consented to go out with him, he wanted to plan the most romantic evening he could. He picked her up at her apartment, and then drove out to the beach. Little Johnny had prepared very carefully for this date and brought out a blanket for them to sit upon the sand and a bottle of the finest wine. The moonlight was shining down on them and Little Johnny poured his date some wine. He handed her the glass, looked lovingly in to her eyes and said, "Now this is what I call romantic. The waves crashing on the shore, the moonlight in your eyes, a warm tropical breeze, a bottle of wine.....," |
* Just a reminder ...
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(='.'=) Dear Dorothy, Hate Oz. Took the shoes.
(")_(") Find your own way home!!! xoxo Toto
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Thanks & Looking Forward,
StumpySteve Wilson, MD
ohmy@misfitscafe.biz
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